Monday, April 26, 2010
Celebration of Life and Golf Tournament
Mark your calendars now for Monday, October 18 when we will hold a golf tournament at New Seabury to benefit the "Cape Medical Supply Mark Sheehan Memorial Foundation." You may get further information by going to the Cape Medical Supply website (www.capemedical.com) click on "foundation" then "golf."
Saturday, April 10 was a beautiful spring day on Cape Cod and the views from Anthony's Cummaquid Inn were breathtaking. Mark's favorite songs played on the speaker throughout the day. Mark's wheelbarrow, gardening gloves and a tree we later planted in our backyard were on display as people entered. Dozens of framed pictures were on tables and 35 years of picture collages were lining the route to the family receiving condolence calls from 11-2. Every 15 minutes a gong sounded to silence the mourners and a speaker or musician performed at the microphone. Friend, John Feeney, spoke eloquently. Childhood friend, Tom Bruce read a letter depicting playful adventures. Dan Sheehan, the oldest of the Sheehan brothers, shared the sadness of losing the family's youngest member. Karen Estrella penned a letter from Cape Medical's trade association NEMED depicting Mark as "quite a character" and expressed appreciation for his outspoken honesty and passion for the industry along with her gratitude that Mark left his living legacies,Gary and Mike who have been a great asset to the organization. Gary's friend, Percy Stith, gave a philosophical speech sharing his impressions of Gary's father. Bob Terry, who flew home from Sanibel with Pam just for the occasion, spoke about the strong ties and adventures the Iannotti/Terry/Sheehan familes experienced over 20 years of family friendships. Dean Coe's skit was hilarious. His wife had passed away last summer and he pretended he received a phone call from her saying that Mark had just arrived in heaven, he was a week late because he had to spend a week in hell and was released in exchange for 250 wheelchairs.
There were four moving musical performances intersperced throughout the day as well. My cousin's husband, Rick Dirienzo, played guitar and sang Mark's favorite song, Tom Rush's "I've Got the Urge for Going." Employee, Paul Morrisey, worked at Cape Medical Supply before he even had children. His daughter,now a senior in high school, has a beautiful voice which was evident when she sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." Melissa Roberts Weidman is in my writing group, writes for Hospice and Palliative Care of Cape Cod and has a band, Flipside and she shared an incredible acappella rendition of "Blowing In the Wind." And, Ann Pratt, who was Mark's Hospice nurse and a long time friend, gave a short speech quoting a meaningful e-mail I sent her as she introduced her husband, Neal, playing a number from the 20's on his saxaphone.
People trickled in between 11 and 12 but between 12 and 2 the line of people waiting to extend their condolences to our family wound around the restaurant backing up to the front door. We had to hurriedly exchange a few words with those still waiting at 2:30 so we could cut it short and get the "Celebration of Life"
ceremony started a few minutes late. By then, 275 people had come to pay their respects.
A harpist played "The Four Seasons" as the "Celebration of Life" got underway and a soloist sang Mark's mother's favorite Irish song, "Danny Boy." I spoke briefly about what a fantastic father Mark had been to our three sons then Mike gave a very powerful speech to an audience which dissolved into tears listening to his memories, gratitude and heartfelt pride in his father. He claimed that his father was a straight shooter and honest man who taught him how to stand up for what he believes is right. He said he learned what courage is by watching his father fight cancer and was inspired by his determination. The soloist then Sang, "The Wind Beneath My Wings."
Kevin read a letter he had written prior to Mark's passing which I had read to Mark the week before he died. Tears flowed as he haltingly stated that he, Gary and Mike were the three luckiest guys in the world to have had a Dad like Mark. They knew they always came first and regardless of what Mark was doing, he was always available when they called him at Cape Medical Supply. It was such an emotional experience for him to read that he kept having to stop. When he neared the end, he assured the audience that he was almost done! Then he went on to say that as a witness to what Mark had been through, no mountain seems too high to climb and no challenge appears too difficult to tackle.
Gary then spoke about Mark in the various roles he played. He claimed that he realized his father's role as grandfather would be limited, so it was especially meaningful to see him with Sean. He believes that watching his father hold Sean in his arms was to better understand what he must have been like as a young father and becoming a father himself made him better understand the power of Mark's love and the impact he had on Gary throughout his life. 15 month old Sean arrived with his other grandmother for the "Celebration of Life" and his little voice could be heard throughout the speeches. Gary wound up the tribute by inviting everyone to stay for H'ors d'oeuvres and drinks and asked them all to join in singing "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling." The words to the song were printed on the back of the program each person received when they arrived.
Since the day of remembrance, we have received many accolades about the personalization injected throughout the day. Many thought it was the most meaningful tribute they had ever witnessed. I have never been so proud of my family and I can assure you that it was exactly what Mark wanted and he would have been so humbled by every word spoken and thoroughly enjoyed the humor and various characterizations of what made him unique and special.
If anyone would like a copy of the program we distributed, please request one by e-mailing me at Sheehan@cape.com and include your mailing address. It has a picture of Mark and Sean, Mark's boat, Seas The Day, and information about donations to the foundation we formed in Mark's honor to support the non-profit community on Cape Cod with special focus on end of life and cancer support services.
I've been working on a book about our family's experiences since Mark's diagnosis in 2006. I share stories about our confusion navigating the medical system, some lessons we learned, my commitment to care giving, the sadness of the final months, the humor that defines our family, as well as adventures and joy our family shared throughout the past four years. I will use the blog to announce its availability which will probably be at the beginning of 2011.
We will also use the blog to announce fundraisers for the foundation. If you would like to make a donation in Mark's memory, it can be sent to "The Cape Medical Supply Mark Sheehan Memorial Foundation" C/O The Cape Cod Foundation, 259 Willow Street, Yarmouth Port, MA 02675.
Meanwhile, remember the golf tournament October 18 at New Seabury and never forget the abundance of appreciation the Sheehan family has for every kindness you bestowed on us, all the cards you sent and the understanding and support you offered our family throughout our four year journey.
With Sincere Gratitude,
Nancy M. Sheehan
Saturday, April 10 was a beautiful spring day on Cape Cod and the views from Anthony's Cummaquid Inn were breathtaking. Mark's favorite songs played on the speaker throughout the day. Mark's wheelbarrow, gardening gloves and a tree we later planted in our backyard were on display as people entered. Dozens of framed pictures were on tables and 35 years of picture collages were lining the route to the family receiving condolence calls from 11-2. Every 15 minutes a gong sounded to silence the mourners and a speaker or musician performed at the microphone. Friend, John Feeney, spoke eloquently. Childhood friend, Tom Bruce read a letter depicting playful adventures. Dan Sheehan, the oldest of the Sheehan brothers, shared the sadness of losing the family's youngest member. Karen Estrella penned a letter from Cape Medical's trade association NEMED depicting Mark as "quite a character" and expressed appreciation for his outspoken honesty and passion for the industry along with her gratitude that Mark left his living legacies,Gary and Mike who have been a great asset to the organization. Gary's friend, Percy Stith, gave a philosophical speech sharing his impressions of Gary's father. Bob Terry, who flew home from Sanibel with Pam just for the occasion, spoke about the strong ties and adventures the Iannotti/Terry/Sheehan familes experienced over 20 years of family friendships. Dean Coe's skit was hilarious. His wife had passed away last summer and he pretended he received a phone call from her saying that Mark had just arrived in heaven, he was a week late because he had to spend a week in hell and was released in exchange for 250 wheelchairs.
There were four moving musical performances intersperced throughout the day as well. My cousin's husband, Rick Dirienzo, played guitar and sang Mark's favorite song, Tom Rush's "I've Got the Urge for Going." Employee, Paul Morrisey, worked at Cape Medical Supply before he even had children. His daughter,now a senior in high school, has a beautiful voice which was evident when she sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." Melissa Roberts Weidman is in my writing group, writes for Hospice and Palliative Care of Cape Cod and has a band, Flipside and she shared an incredible acappella rendition of "Blowing In the Wind." And, Ann Pratt, who was Mark's Hospice nurse and a long time friend, gave a short speech quoting a meaningful e-mail I sent her as she introduced her husband, Neal, playing a number from the 20's on his saxaphone.
People trickled in between 11 and 12 but between 12 and 2 the line of people waiting to extend their condolences to our family wound around the restaurant backing up to the front door. We had to hurriedly exchange a few words with those still waiting at 2:30 so we could cut it short and get the "Celebration of Life"
ceremony started a few minutes late. By then, 275 people had come to pay their respects.
A harpist played "The Four Seasons" as the "Celebration of Life" got underway and a soloist sang Mark's mother's favorite Irish song, "Danny Boy." I spoke briefly about what a fantastic father Mark had been to our three sons then Mike gave a very powerful speech to an audience which dissolved into tears listening to his memories, gratitude and heartfelt pride in his father. He claimed that his father was a straight shooter and honest man who taught him how to stand up for what he believes is right. He said he learned what courage is by watching his father fight cancer and was inspired by his determination. The soloist then Sang, "The Wind Beneath My Wings."
Kevin read a letter he had written prior to Mark's passing which I had read to Mark the week before he died. Tears flowed as he haltingly stated that he, Gary and Mike were the three luckiest guys in the world to have had a Dad like Mark. They knew they always came first and regardless of what Mark was doing, he was always available when they called him at Cape Medical Supply. It was such an emotional experience for him to read that he kept having to stop. When he neared the end, he assured the audience that he was almost done! Then he went on to say that as a witness to what Mark had been through, no mountain seems too high to climb and no challenge appears too difficult to tackle.
Gary then spoke about Mark in the various roles he played. He claimed that he realized his father's role as grandfather would be limited, so it was especially meaningful to see him with Sean. He believes that watching his father hold Sean in his arms was to better understand what he must have been like as a young father and becoming a father himself made him better understand the power of Mark's love and the impact he had on Gary throughout his life. 15 month old Sean arrived with his other grandmother for the "Celebration of Life" and his little voice could be heard throughout the speeches. Gary wound up the tribute by inviting everyone to stay for H'ors d'oeuvres and drinks and asked them all to join in singing "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling." The words to the song were printed on the back of the program each person received when they arrived.
Since the day of remembrance, we have received many accolades about the personalization injected throughout the day. Many thought it was the most meaningful tribute they had ever witnessed. I have never been so proud of my family and I can assure you that it was exactly what Mark wanted and he would have been so humbled by every word spoken and thoroughly enjoyed the humor and various characterizations of what made him unique and special.
If anyone would like a copy of the program we distributed, please request one by e-mailing me at Sheehan@cape.com and include your mailing address. It has a picture of Mark and Sean, Mark's boat, Seas The Day, and information about donations to the foundation we formed in Mark's honor to support the non-profit community on Cape Cod with special focus on end of life and cancer support services.
I've been working on a book about our family's experiences since Mark's diagnosis in 2006. I share stories about our confusion navigating the medical system, some lessons we learned, my commitment to care giving, the sadness of the final months, the humor that defines our family, as well as adventures and joy our family shared throughout the past four years. I will use the blog to announce its availability which will probably be at the beginning of 2011.
We will also use the blog to announce fundraisers for the foundation. If you would like to make a donation in Mark's memory, it can be sent to "The Cape Medical Supply Mark Sheehan Memorial Foundation" C/O The Cape Cod Foundation, 259 Willow Street, Yarmouth Port, MA 02675.
Meanwhile, remember the golf tournament October 18 at New Seabury and never forget the abundance of appreciation the Sheehan family has for every kindness you bestowed on us, all the cards you sent and the understanding and support you offered our family throughout our four year journey.
With Sincere Gratitude,
Nancy M. Sheehan
Friday, April 02, 2010
Mark Sheehan, 1948-2010
Mark Sheehan passed away Friday, April 2, 2010 at home. He fought several grueling battles with admirable determination since being diagnosed with a rare form of Squamous cell cancer in 2006. His resolve and willingness to endure 90 radiation treatments and a half dozen strains of chemo afforded him the longevity to share in many family triumphs, including his son, Gary’s, remission from Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, special occasions like his son, Mike’s wedding, a summer of adventures with his son Kevin and the birth of his first grandchild, Sean, who sometimes accompanied his Papa to treatments.
Mark was a businessman, an involved member of the community and served in many capacities throughout his life but his role as father transcended all other achievements. Despite his many business and community involvements, Mark always prioritized time with his family and his three sons have become men that are a testament to his love and commitment.
Two of his sons attended Burke Mountain Academy in Vermont and Mark trekked all over New England driving them to races and championing their ski racing competitions. All three of his sons were on many baseball and soccer travel teams and he enthusiastically spent countless hours with them as a coach and spectator on sports fields all over the state and served on the original youth soccer board in Sandwich. He was an avid sports enthusiast himself and played on an “over 30” hockey team in Bourne in the late 70’s, on Sandwich Town Tennis Teams and at Mid-Cape Racquet Club in the 80’s. He took up golf in the 90’s and was a member of New Seabury Country Club in recent years. The Sheehans moved from Sandwich to Mashpee in 1999.
Mark was original in his thinking, honest in expressing opinions and injected irreverent humor into all his endeavors. His serious side, high expectations and angry outbursts were reserved for things that really mattered...like questionable calls by umpires at Little League games and the Red Sox blowing a lead! As a result, some viewed Mark as an easy going, comical, civic minded business owner while others would characterize him as a harsh, competitive sports fanatic! However, they’d all agree that he had a strong sense of values, was a man of integrity and had a compassionate heart. He’d fight to the end for what he thought was “fair” and became a beacon for others in his industry throughout the country championing parity and transparency. Although basically an upstanding, law abiding citizen, Mark was a rebel at heart. From his stint in the army through the onslaught of cancer treatments, Mark regarded precautions and “stupid” rules as challenges he must defy.
Mark moved to the Cape in 1977 with his wife, Nancy, and together they started the now “second generation” business CAPE MEDICAL SUPPLY. In addition to his role as an entrepreneur, Mark was very involved in the local community as well as with his company’s regional trade organization. He was chosen as “Business Man of the Year” in the late 70’s by the Bourne-Sandwich Chamber of Commerce. He was on the “Search Committee” for the first Sandwich town Manager in 1986 then served on Sandwich’s first part time board of selectman in 1987.
Cape Medical Supply won the Business Philanthropist award in 2008. Mark was on the board of the VNA of Cape Cod and worked closely with Hospice & Palliative Care of Cape Cod since its inception. He also served on the board of the New England Medical Equipment Dealers. He was integral in raising money for RHCI, was on their annual golf committee for many years and served as its president for a few years. Despite his many public commitments, Mark’s true passion in life was solitude in the outdoors. His dream was to create a magnificent landscape in the flourishing yard he nourished on the shore of the Mashpee River.
Mark leaves his wife of 34 years, Nancy, with whom he was partnered in business and united in parenting. They are the proud parents of three sons: Gary and his wife Kristina Conaway of Yarmouth. Gary has been the President & CEO of Cape Medical Supply since Mark and Nancy suddenly departed due to Mark’s cancer in August of 2006. Michael and his wife, Stephanie Savas, of Weymouth. Mike returned to the area from CA to lend support to the family and help with the business when his father was diagnosed with cancer. And, Kevin who has traveled extensively pursuing the highest levels of competitive ski racing and is currently on the ski team of Sierra Nevada College in the Lake Tahoe area. Kevin and his girlfriend, Katie Hitchcock, returned home for the summer of 2009 to be with Mark when his cancer returned and helped him realize his vision of bountiful gardens on the property he loved. Mark also leaves the love of his life, his 15 month old grandson, Sean David Sheehan.
In addition, Mark leaves his siblings Dan (Natalie) of Centerville, Joe (Carol) of North Carolina, Jack (Jane) of New Hampshire and Marion (Tom) of Florida and many nieces and nephews. He will be missed by his in-laws Richard and Claire McBrine, extended family members and many close friends and beloved long time staff members. He grew up in Newton and was the much loved youngest child of Marion and Daniel J. Sheehan who predeceased him.
The Sheehan family is grateful to oncologist, Dr. Victor Aviles, who compassionately guided Mark through his four years of cancer treatments. Mark spent countless hours in the refuge of his North Falmouth office and found much solace in the warm embrace of his caring staff. Hospice & Palliative Care of Cape Cod’s Nurses and
their haven, the Mary McCarthy Hospice House, were instrumental in easing Mark’s plight in the final months of his life and enabled him to fulfill his wish of passing away at home.
No flowers. We ask that you recognize Mark’s journey with a kind gesture or a donation to “The Cape Medical Supply Mark Sheehan Memorial Foundation” which has been established in honor of Mark’s lifelong passion for the local non-profit community.
The foundation’s mission is to meet the needs of the Cape Cod community, with special focus on end of life and cancer support services. It will be professionally managed and a donation in any amount will be gratefully accepted:
“The Cape Medical Supply Mark Sheehan Memorial Foundation” C/O The Cape Cod Foundation, 259 Willow Street, Yarmouth Port, MA 02675
Condolence calls may be made to the Sheehan Family at Anthony’s Cummaquid Inn, Saturday, April 10, 2010 from 11 am until 2 pm. Mark’s wife and three sons will host a Celebration of Mark’s life at 2:30 at Anthony’s Cummaquid Inn. All are welcome.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Quick Update
The past few months have been painful physically and mentally. Hospice nurses started visiting Mark once a week in early Dec. and they have helped enormously in finding the right mix of pain medication to ease the pain in Mark's wound. He has seen the Lymphadema specialist several times and she has brought the swelling down in his arm considerably. He started a weekly regimen of Erbitux (like chemo) the week before Christmas and it will continue indefinitely. The oncologist believes that it is important to try to keep the tumors at bay.
However, the wound under Mark's arm is now the center of our universe. It has been infected twice--three infections each time-- since the last posting and I have administered two weeks of two antibiotics each time which were prescribed by an infection specialist he now sees. The wound has grown considerably and it is never expected to heal and will probably continue to get infected despite our best efforts at packing it each day with a solution to help starve off infections. None of the medical professionals have ever seen a wound of this magnitude in an unexposed area such as the armpit. And, further prodding in the area could be lethal so the best we can do is take good care of it. Mark's weight fluctuates and he looks pretty good which is deceiving because the entire area of concern now is not necessarily the cancer but the wound.
Therefore, it has been a very difficult period for Mark and the family because we are all coming to terms with the reality of the negative prognosis for the future of the wound and the dangers it poses.
Mark has just finished a regimen of antibiotics so the Hospice nurse persuaded us to visit our condo in Puerto Rico during this short period of respite from antibiotics. It wasn't an easy "sell" because Mark has spent most of the past six months in his room or in doctor's offices and has gone from one emergency situation to the next so he has great trepidation. But, it's a 4 hour non-stop flight, our favorite grandson will be there for part of the visit and we've packed up a suitcase full of bandages. We'll be gone for ten days or so. We are so grateful that the Hospice nurse was able to push us into having fun in the sun. Those Hospice angels work miracles!
Thanks as always for your good wishes, support and even banana bread from Mark's most loyal supporter Barbara O'Hear. Three and a half years is a long time to root for someone but we appreciate your continued interest.
Again though, I have to act as the "gatekeeper" because Mark truly does not want to see or talk to anyone. Please don't take it personally, it's just his way of handling his illness and all the physical and emotional upheaval it has caused in his life. If you want to send a note to him, you can send it to my e-mail sheehan@cape.com. I do read him all correspondence but be forewarned, he does not respond. It has become a stressful job for me to convince people that he just doesn't want to see anyone other than his kids. I just ask you to respect his wishes.
However, the wound under Mark's arm is now the center of our universe. It has been infected twice--three infections each time-- since the last posting and I have administered two weeks of two antibiotics each time which were prescribed by an infection specialist he now sees. The wound has grown considerably and it is never expected to heal and will probably continue to get infected despite our best efforts at packing it each day with a solution to help starve off infections. None of the medical professionals have ever seen a wound of this magnitude in an unexposed area such as the armpit. And, further prodding in the area could be lethal so the best we can do is take good care of it. Mark's weight fluctuates and he looks pretty good which is deceiving because the entire area of concern now is not necessarily the cancer but the wound.
Therefore, it has been a very difficult period for Mark and the family because we are all coming to terms with the reality of the negative prognosis for the future of the wound and the dangers it poses.
Mark has just finished a regimen of antibiotics so the Hospice nurse persuaded us to visit our condo in Puerto Rico during this short period of respite from antibiotics. It wasn't an easy "sell" because Mark has spent most of the past six months in his room or in doctor's offices and has gone from one emergency situation to the next so he has great trepidation. But, it's a 4 hour non-stop flight, our favorite grandson will be there for part of the visit and we've packed up a suitcase full of bandages. We'll be gone for ten days or so. We are so grateful that the Hospice nurse was able to push us into having fun in the sun. Those Hospice angels work miracles!
Thanks as always for your good wishes, support and even banana bread from Mark's most loyal supporter Barbara O'Hear. Three and a half years is a long time to root for someone but we appreciate your continued interest.
Again though, I have to act as the "gatekeeper" because Mark truly does not want to see or talk to anyone. Please don't take it personally, it's just his way of handling his illness and all the physical and emotional upheaval it has caused in his life. If you want to send a note to him, you can send it to my e-mail sheehan@cape.com. I do read him all correspondence but be forewarned, he does not respond. It has become a stressful job for me to convince people that he just doesn't want to see anyone other than his kids. I just ask you to respect his wishes.
